Telegram Is Russian Intel

Complimentary slaps available if you require one.

Telegram is a Russian service.

It is as corrupt as anything else that originates in Russia.

If you need some sense slapped into you, take a number.

You are eligible for a palm/back of the hand wake up call if you’re at all confused about Telegram’s “move to Dubai”.

Are you confused about Signal vs. Telegram? There’s an optional swift kick package for those of you who are really this dumb, but that’s a limited time offer.

What does the fact that Telegram Founder Pavel Duroc Arrested mean?

If you start a sentence with “I’m using Telegram” and you don’t finish it with something like “on a burner phone so I can monitor this one group of extremist channels”.

Well ..

*palm* *backhand* *palm* *backhand* *palm* *backhand*

And you’d better not be spreading crap about Signal Funding from Kit Klarenberg. I catch you and there will be a new Known Dipshits section added to ChewToys with you in the front right seat of this very special short bus.