Chronic Anger

More time off indicated

I took time off during July due to my surgery, which went amazingly well.

Friday I had some blood work done to verify what I mentioned in Surgery Status: OMG. Histamine intolerance was close, but not a perfect match. We’re checking another theory and if it proves out, I’m stuck with something incurable, but it IS manageable. And I’ll happily take that consolation prize.

But at a personal level I am angry.

Not the burnout sort of stuff, it’s people around me.

And I’m taking time off, before I do something rash.

Attention Conservation Notice:

Angry old man drags everybody, without naming names …

Drags:

I’m god damned tired of Substance Abuse. I mean, at thirty years sober, I get it, but I have never had so many people close to me ram their heads so far up their butts in such a short amount of time since the early 1990s.

And this Lying business. First, most of you really suck at it, like less skill than kitteh when she thinks she’s going to work me for an extra ration of wet food. Even if you get away with it temporarily, people tend to get … stubborn, once they catch you out. So just don’t.

Breaking Confidence. This is a spectrum, it’s the thing I like the least, and it’s the thing that’s on my mind the most. Don’t feel singled out here, there’s been a couple instances. You don’t know how I feel about yours. I am not overtly, consciously angry about any of these, but I think it’s a fundamental issue.

Money. This is a separate subsection, sort of an annex to the prior section on lying. Again, multiple fuckups here, so don’t feel singled out. I am letting things go … but closing the books. Hope it was worth it, because it’ll never happen again.

Aging. I’m having another period where, thanks to the magic of California medical care, stuff gets a LOT better for me. I am not angry at those of you who are suffering age related troubles, but it does irritate me to see you dealing with such things. OK, I lied there a bit, because some of you need to change your diets, and all of you need to get off your butts and walk more.

Honesty. The lying business has been mostly “cash register honesty”. This is more about introspection … I see people ramming their heads into obstacles that have been obvious for some time, then staggering back all bloody and confused. I am by no means perfect, but I’ll at least kinda listen if one of you tries to convey concerns about what I am doing.

Romantic Entanglement. Get a notebook. Write down what’s going on with you and whomever else. Go to a mirror and read it out loud. Are you cringing? OK, lemme tell ya, the rest of us are, too. If things are not right, maybe just shake hands and move on?

Corruption. Nope, not even gonna start on this one. Just can’t.

Conclusion:

There are probably some other things pissing me off that I’ve forgotten, but this is the core of it. If you would be embarrassed to tell someone else what you’re doing … maybe don’t do it?

I’m going to keep my mouth shut.

I probably should apologize here and there.

Hitting people has never really produced positive results for me, so I’m just going to absent myself from situations that make me feel that urge.

And on that note, I’ll be back no later than August 30th, for the two year anniversary of this most peculiar of Substacks.